Notes on What makes a good leader? by Daniel Goleman (Harvard Business Review) and some self-reflection
“After all, the leader’s task is to get work done through other people, and social skill makes that possible. A leader who cannot express empathy may not have it all. And a leader’s motivation will be useless if he cannot communicate his passion to the organization. Social skill allows leaders to put their emotional intelligence to work.” - Daniel Goleman (Harvard Business Review)
In the past 6 months, I’ve done some deep self-reflection and realized that I need to be more empathetic. So I’m undergoing leadership training for the first time in my life. Unfortunately, I did not grow up in an empathetic culture w.r.t. western standards, and I suspect this cultural conflict may lead to being misunderstood and misSeen. Coupled with the fact that people whom I’m around all the time do not practice such good leadership skills (we’re all engineers and scientists), there are no people to be inspired by on a daily basis. However, occasionally, I get to interact with great leaders and their ability to make us “feel good”. Such a skillset is something I want to work towards, and I feel like it would not only make my interpersonal relationships better and more diverse but will also expand my life experiences.
Five aspects of good leadership
In the article “What makes a good leader?”, Daniel Goleman discusses the importance of emotional intelligence in leadership, which is arguably as or more important than IQ and technical skills. He outlines the five key areas of leadership and argues that good leadership can be learned
Self-awareness: The ability to recognize and deeply understand own emotions, strengths, weaknesses, needs, and drives, and their effect on others. This means having self-confidence and realistic assessments of self and others. Generally honest with themselves and others can speak accurately and openly, but not necessarily effusively or confessionally about their emotions and their impact on their work.
Self-regulation: The ability to control or redirect disruptive impulses and moods. Specifically suspending judgment before acting. This improves trustworthiness and integrity, provides comfort with ambiguity, and openness to change.
Motivation: A passion to work for reasons beyond money or status and a propensity to pursue goals with energy and persistence.
Empathy: A thoughtful consideration of feelings along with other factors - in the process of making intelligent decisions. An example of this is to be upfront about confusion and worry and promise to keep everyone informed and to treat everyone fairly.
Social skill: a proficiency in managing relationships and building networks and an ability to find common ground and built rapport.
Self-reflection
In terms of my own key aspects, I rank very high in self-actualization, social responsibility, and impulse control, but lack in interpersonal relationships, emotional expression, and empathy. Low interpersonal relationships indicate that I do not leverage relationships as much as others, and further down the line, this will lead to issues in mutually satisfying relationships that will help me gain buy-in, instill trust, and garner the resources you and your team need. While interpersonal relationships is important for connections, making the existing connections stronger is extremely important as well. Emotional expression and empathy are the two most important things that I need to work on. Becoming more expressive and understanding of other peoples’ feelings will allow me to be a more inspirational leader who is able to share a compelling vision.